November 3, 2010

On Bribing People to Become My Friend

I have a question for you guys.

Justin is leaving for Afghanistan in a few months and I'm faced with a quandary... How do I make new friends when he's away and when I work from home all day? 

Man, making friends used to be so easy! Back in the day, I'd chat with the girl sitting next to me at school and invite her to my house to play Legos. Voila, instant friend! But now that I'm 27 and have moved back to my hometown, I realize most of my high school friends have left for New York and my college pals live on the other side of the country. What's a girl like me to do?

I've been fortunate enough to have met some wonderful, wonderful people through blogging and various writerly forums. Thank you, Lynn, for our marathon lunch sessions! Thank you Jessica and Robin for our Gallery Place adventures! And thank you Alexa and Ellen for being so cool and not thinking I'm a crazy person! Yes, I count myself as very lucky to have met these great women. newfound friends have very busy lives to lead and I'm sure they don't want me calling every evening to ask, "What are you up to? Mind if I come on over? Aw, why not?!" Thus, the question remains: where do I find more people to add to my friend collection? At the mall? At the park? Just around the river bend? 

I've thought about getting more involved at my library, maybe join a book club if they have one. Or I could do some volunteer work. Or I could take a class while Justin's away (perhaps painting or web design). Or...something else! 

So how have you guys made friends since college? Any advice for me? :)


  1. Your title made me laugh! And I think you're very cool too and the best kind of crazy ;) And I'm looking forward to cupcakes.

    But seriously it is hard to make friends as a grownup. Volunteer work sounds like a great idea. I think the zoo have quite a cool programme or I guess air and space for you :)

    Plus I think you should start a YA for adults bookclub and then I can join!! I have been looking for one in DC but there is nothing.

  2. Classes are definitely the way to go! Even if you don't find someone to hang out with outside of the class, it is nice to have a group to chitchat with once a week.

    I have a studio at home but started to miss people, so I started going to open studio night at a church nearby, and while none of the people will become fast friends, it is great to be social with people who I share an interest with.

  3. Alexa, I can't wait for cupcakes either! Yay! Actually, a YA book club in the DC area sounds like a brilliant idea! I'm totally in. Now, I just rummage up some other people... :)

    Vicki, you must be Andrea's sister! Thanks for visiting my blog! I'm taking your advice and looking into some classes in my area. Hopefully I can find an art class since I find them to be really relaxing. By the way, I hope I can make it to your show in Frederick! Andrea told me about your work and I'd love to see it in person!

  4. My local indie bookstore has some fun events- Scrabble matches and so on. You might want to check something like that out. And a book club is a great way to meet new people!

  5. Well, in six months I'll be back in your neck of the woods, and I will totally hang out with you. I still have to introduce you to the Lavender Moon cupcakery!

    That doesn't really help you now though. I love the suggestion of the YA book club--I keep meaning to look for book clubs in my area here in Melbourne, and always meant to back in DC too.

    I don't know if you ever played a sport as a kid, but joining an adult intramural group can be a lot of fun. I used to do intramural soccer (even though I am TOTALLY out of shape) and it was tons of fun, and I met cool people.

    And what about classes? Whether it's cooking classes, dance classes, adult academic classes at the local college, etc., I think those are great ways to meet people. I soooo want to take a bartending class...

  6. This totally doesn't solve the problem, but you could come visit! And I'll even let you write here. Promise. :)

    We should talk.

  7. Caroline, this is such a common problem. Actually, I really didn't start making a ton of friends until I had kids and met other mother's. It can get lonely when you work from home - too bad you aren't in Chicago. I bet you and I could kick up a ton of trouble together:)

  8. Honestly, Caroline--I've never met a stranger. I tend to make friends even when I'm not trying to. LOL.

    You could make them anytime you're out shopping, at the bookstore, etc.

    And I have some friends who live far away--like you, so I do lots of e-mail, phone calls, IM's. And I visit folks when I get a chance and when they get one too.

    But I understand completely. ;-)