So Cute I think I'm going to Explode

In the world of babies, there are cute babies and there are ugly ones. Ugly babies include the naked mole rat, the pufferfish, and the human newborn, which often looks red-faced and scrunched. Ugly babies make people cringe and cause a little bit of bile to rise in their mouths. Cute babies, on the other hand, make people melt and cause them to say "Oh! Can I hold it?"

Such is the case with baby harp seals, who are in my mind the cutest babies on Earth. Just look at them: soft snowy fur, little paws and tail, and those melt-your-heart black eyes. What's not to love? I just want to scoop one up in my arms and kiss it's furry little cheek.

One of the saddest things in the world is when cute little babies become orphaned. A few years ago I saw a documentary where a baby harp seal lost its mother to poachers. The little baby was distraught and it followed around the camera crew, crying for milk because it was so hungry. The camera crew couldn't do anything to help, however, because they didn't have anything to feed this poor little harp seal.

Thus the baby harp seal died! I think I cried and I tried to bargain with my TV. "I'll take care of the baby harp seal!" I said while banging on my television, "What do you need me to do? I'll move to Antartica."

Oh, baby harp seals. How I love you. If I could, I would adopt one of you.

You could live in my bathtub and in my backyard. I could buy you an igloo so you can stay cool in the summer months. Living with humans wouldn't be so bad: no need to catch food or worry about predators.

I think I would make a great harp seal mom.