Apparently, I have an infestation of gnomes living within the walls of my apartment.
I know, I know... Gnomes only exist in fairytales and in that old Nickolodeon cartoon "David the Gnome"! But Justin assures me on regular occasion how gnomes do indeed live in our world. He even sees them on occasion.
For instance, I oftentimes leave a glass of water on our coffee table---only to find it empty of its contents after I turn my back away for a few seconds. Other times I will leave some food sitting on the kitchen counter, hoping to munch on it later in the day, only to find the entire plate eaten by the time I get hungry again.
Every time this happens, I turn to Justin and ask, "What happened to my stuff?"
He lets out a small burp and looks at me with his innocent green eyes. "The gnomes took it."
I frown and tell him, "Gnomes don't exist, honey."
"Of course, they do," he says while wiping the mysterious crumbs from his mouth. "They live in our toilet."
"Then why didn't you try to stop them from taking our food?"
"They're too fast. Plus, they're nasty and covered in poop."
How baffling! I wonder why he sees the gnomes all the time while I have yet to catch a glimpse of one. How puzzling indeed...